scary days..

So Maddie had been coughing for a few days after having strep, and she seemed to be getting worse so I brought her in to the doctor. Well it was the scariest doctor visit I have ever had! When the nurse listened to Maddies heart she looked at me, didn't say anything, and went and got the doctor...hello way to panic a mom!! Doctor Hughes came in and immediately checked her pulse ox (no clue how to spell that) which meant her oxygen level was low, she was put on a nebulizer for about 10 minutes and then they checked her oxygen levels again which were still low. At this point they said if her levels didn't go up after the next breathing treatment then she would be admitted......OK I am in FULL HYSTERIA MODE!!!! The worst was calling Steve to tell him what was going on as I had a screaming baby at the doctors, we all know how calm Steve can be in these situations....We were sent home with a nebulizer of our own. After a very long night, and more wheezing we went back to the doctor on Friday. We were told to increase her breathing treatments to every few hours ( including nighttime...eeeek!) and she was giving a dose of steroids to help her lungs.  I have no medical background or training of every kind, and anyone who knows me knows throw me a cold, stomach bug, allergies, anything but breathing issues!!!! Today is Saturday and I don't think Steve or I have put Maddie down for longer than 5 minutes.  She is finally feeling better, eating more, trying to play with Olivia, who for the first time ever seems to take an interest in her sister....Its been a few scary days but we have had a lot of people praying for us and it has worked:)

Liv trying to curl Maddies hair!

Manny trying to give kisses

Liv giving kisses

poor baby :(

Manny really has not left Maddies side in the last few days

One of those days...

I refuse to be one of those bloggers who isn't realistic. Life is hard and wonderful at the same time. sometimes I wonder if moving here was worth it...On one hand we will be able to buy a much bigger house than we ever anticipated,send our kids to the best schools if we want................. however Steve works non-stop with his new promotion............ Our girls have limited time with cousins and grandparents, yet it's more anticipated and appreciated....is there really a happy balance? So here is my rant (aka blog). Yes I will have a large glass of wine and wake up tomorrow with a full nights sleep and optimistic outlook...( power of positive thinking right! :)

So today was one of those days, the kind where you know what kind of day it's going to be so you don't want to get out of bed days...today has been building up for a while, hubby has been workin 18 hour days non-stop, both kiddos have had strep, ear infections, and coughs within the last week, and I haven't slept more than two hours In a row at night in weeks... This means lack of sleep and we all know how well I do on no sleep (insert sarcastic remark). Ths is all in addition to one of my friends and close neighbor who is moving about 25 minutes away. Normally not a big deal but when you move 1500 miles from every person you know, starting over is hard and you meet a few close friends who yout rust and dont want ANYTHING to change...Honestly I knew this move was coming, but seeing the moving boxes has really brought alot of these emotions of moving down here all over again. Both Steve and my Mom says it's normal to have these emotions, but when you've literally moved thousands of miles, while preggers and without knowing a soul, you tend to not really like any kind of change.

Today was hard. But that's life. I'm grateful for everything I do have and that is what I am going to think when I sleep tonight. So here is to positive changes:)

Movie!

This past Sunday we headed to the movies to see Beauty and the Beast with our friends Kel and Caroline. ( Pictures are from my phone so may be a bit blurry.) I wasn't sure how Liv would do, this was her second movie but she has been sick lately so we thought this was the perfect low key activity...boy were we wrong! Both girls LOVED singing and DANCING to every song in the movie! It was all little kid's in the theater so thankfully no one was annoyed but it was pretty cute as the girls are dancing and singing (always a positive that the movie was loud!) Liv loved the whole idea of a special Mommy and Livy date (Maddie was at home with strep throat with Steve)  It was so nice to be able to spend time with her and I am going to make more of an effort to do separate activities with each girl :)

Liv eating her favority candy!

Liv and Caroline dancing in the hallway

of course they have to throw pennies in the fountain

next movie the girls want to see!

handing there tickets, very exciting!

both girls showing me their movie tickets :)

Play-house time!

So for this past Christmas Mimi and Papa Moe ordered a playhouse for the girls! It arrived and of course with my ADD I had to put it together immediately. Olivia loves to help (which is usually more work) so we set Maddie in the exersaucer and got to work! I gave Liv her own screwdriver while I used his power drill.  It was very simple to put together, just screwing in and putting some stickers on...until I got to the door handle. Who thought it would be so difficult to figure out how to put a fake door handle in, I have put real door handle's together easier than this playhouse! Once that drama was over, we had a missing doorbell.....one guess who had it....he's furry and and hates the vacuum...Manny! In true Beane family style it had our signature mark of a chewed up doorbell, but works fine! The girls have a blast playing in it and cannot wait for warmer weather to put it in the yard!

the first step...

Liv and her screwdriver

pictures look pretty simple.....Pictures are misleading!!!!!



who has the damn doorbell?!?!

the damage

Manny thought it was a new toy for him

the finished product!!

Grateful.

Sorry peeps, no pictures with this blog post, just a rant about how incredibly blessed I have been feeling. Perhaps I'm being neurotic but I have one of my worst fears is that my children will grow up spoiled and expect certain things rather than work for them. So the Beane Family has started a thankful jar, each day Liv and I will write something we are thankful for. I'm hoping this will begin to teach her how to be Grateful. After I had given the girls a bath tonight, (Steve is traveling for work) Maddie had fallen asleep on me and we were on the couch watching Livs favorite movie. As I was starring at both girls I had this overwhelming emotion of pure happiness. Not the kind where you get that outfit you've been eyeing for half price,but just a pure happiness that I felt so grateful for. I have two healthy beautiful daughters that we are raising and I never want to forget these quiet moments that I have with them. I feel so grateful that we took a chance and moved very far away from all of our family and friends and started over without knowing anyone. It is still hard to be so far from family, but we have the means to visit whenever we want, which I feel very lucky for. Financial gain does not make one happy, but when you work so hard it is gratifying to be able to provide for our children, save for a house, and have that extra money to take vacations. I'm grateful that our girls will know and have relationships with both their grandparents. This is important now, as well as 10 years down the road, to show family traditions, old story's about us, and summer vacations without their parents! I'm grateful that I have a husband who LOVES to be a father. If I ever got sick, I have no doubt that he would do a wonderful job raising our kids:) I'm also grateful that after 5 years I still love him like our first date and still get butterfly's when I see him. I'm grateful for our animals, yes Manny included! When I've had a hard day and the kids are screaming, our dogs (and cats) are always there offering support and love with a simple lick:). I'm also grateful for my new friends, a quick phone call or text makes me feel like I'm not so alone down here. It's funnny how a dinner out with a gf or two can get you recharged and ready for a new day! It's comforting to know that your not the only mom out there who has dried throw up from your infant at breakfast, in your hair still....at dinner time. I'm also grateful for my mum, who no matter what.. picks up the phone and answers some ridicules "mom question" I have. Last week we were CONVInCED Maddie had cystic fibrosis, And after calmly talking me down from my hysteria, we determined that it was a minor cold....perhaps it's because it almost my 30 birthday, or that I am truly happy,orfinally maturing, but I feel truly blessed to be where I am in life. The majority of my days may be filled with nonstop elmo, diaper changes, and bottles, but I never want to forget how lucky I really am to be me (corny I know!).....



"Never let a day pass without looking for the good, feeling the good within you, praising, appreciating, blessing and being grateful. "

bath time!

Chaos. That is the word that comes to mind when we discuss bath time at the Beane house.  When Steve is traveling for work it is all business, your in your out and bed. However on nights that the hubby is home it is a bit more relaxed with the extra set of hands. The minute Maddie hears running water she immediatly smiles and starts crawling towards the tub.  We have been really blessed with kids who love water! Liv has recently started taking an interest in helping bath Madelyn which has resulted in numerous near drownings (just kidding). Liv love to helps wash her hair with soap, and then dump buckets of water (not joking here but wish I was :) So enjoy our little slide show of pictures of bath time at the beanes:)

bath time=smiles!!

Manny always needs to supervise bath time!

cutie-patootie (how the heck do you even spell that?)

wash your hair time :)

ok I admit it I bribed her to kiss her so shoot me!!

Liv showing her barbies (that if Mad dare touches it is all over!!)

near drowning....I mean Liv washing Maddie's hair

beautiful!

all clean:)

all clean getting into trouble!

24 hours.....

We are finally coming out the other end after a long 24 hours of the stomach bug at the Beanes. This was Olivia's first time getting really sick and I think it was harder on me then her. after 5 loads of laundry, Popsicles, and thermometer checks, Steve looked at me at one point and told me to take a break and I'm thinking do I really look that bad?? The answer was Yes, I had vomit (dried) on multiple places on my shirt, my hair was a mess, and my mascara was running from Liv crying on my shoulder. Perhaps this was a test for the next 20 years of being parent, and if so I FAILEd miserably....every time she got sick I just wanted it to be me, I slept a totally of 3 hours in bed with her praying that she was getting better. Everytime she even snored I was hoovering over her making sure she was still breathing (nuerotic?). ....long story short....While she was running around this afternoon playing tea party with her dolls, I wondered (in a sleepy/delirious haze)how the hell I was ever going to do this 100 more times as a parent!!!